Femme Feature – Tanya of TrapMystic
Welcome to Femme Features. Femme Features is a blog series featuring femmes from all nooks of the LGBTQIA community. These rocking folks are activists, educators, bosses, parents, entrepreneurs, and all sorts of amazing human beings. Join us as we explore femme identity as so much more than a label, but truly a way of life. You can check out all of our queer femme fashion, lifestyle, and activist profiles here.
Tanya comes to us from Toronto by way of Instagram. Dannie has been following her for a while and is super into her style and her messaging. A creative, queer entrepreneur and wellness educator? You KNOW that’s what we’re all about at Fashionably Femme. Check out her website here [click!] and make sure to give our girl a follow on Instagram [also click!]! You can also visit her social wellness enterprise NiaZiamar: Redefining Beauty here.
Exploring Femme Identity: What it is and What it Isn’t
My name is Tanya Turton and I am a creative entrepreneur and wellness educator living in Toronto Canada. When I was first coming to my queerness, I felt like much of what I saw didn’t fully represent how I felt. I came across this post on Tumblr where someone was describing a lipstick lesbian, which came close to how I felt, but I wasn’t a lesbian, so it didn’t quite entirely fit me… ultimately, when lesbian and queer didn’t quite explain how I felt, Femme did. Femme for me is not simply an aesthetic, it is the process of pulling my energy, power and sense of self from the Divine feminine that lives in me. What makes my Femme unique is there are no rules, all feeling. Each outfit, hairstyle and make-up choice is built from the energy and feeling inside of me, this is how I reflect my soul to the world, I am my work of art. Femme is sacred. Femme is Divine. Femme is a spiritual practice.
One thing I would want non-femme people to know is the my aesthetic is not a signifier of my personality. When I was dating, women would ask things like, are you an aggressive femme, as they tried desperately to categorize me. Now that I am married, my partner is androgynous and way more masculine then I am, but in personality our aesthetic says nothing about submissive or dominant characteristics. Femme has nothing to do with gender or personality, femme is a representation of where I find my strength.
Blending Masc and Femme Fashion to Create The Femme
I represent my femme energy by mixing up what I perceive to be soft or hard aesthetics —a mini skirt with doc Martin heels and lots of layers, or baggy pants, heels and a crop top. I like to play with ideas of masculinity and femininity with my Femme. My style continues to evolve, but, ultimately, this brand of femme has been with me for my lifetime. I look high-femme in my make-up and hair, but its my unique style as a whole that says I’m a little edgy, quirky, soft, confident, bossy and Divine.
Tanya’s Femme Identity Inspirations and Evolving a Look
My style is inspired by everything, there is no particular person. I usually find inspiration from random colours, emotions or art. Recently, Tracee Ellis Ross, inspired me to play with cornrows again. I do scroll though Pinterest looking for inspiration when I want to evolve a look I feel. I went thrifting last week and found the most beautiful purple-blue, over-sized, vintage sweater blazer, it sung to my heart because of the patterns, lines, texture and layers, and it is currently my favourite!
I believe we are all a blend of masculine and feminine. We essentially show up to the world embodying a little more or less of each. I am extremely feminine in my aesthetic and draw power from this, making me femme. I am also masculine and feel grounded in this internally. I have had to learn to be okay with this and find beauty in both aspects of myself. People are often surprised when they get to know me, so it feels like my little secret. The world can only understand me with time, I’m okay with that.
My hope is one way we won’t make assumptions based on adornment practices. I like the saying “Femme on Purpose” as a reminder that I am not here by accident… this is intentional.
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